Thank You For Smoking

New MPAA fuehrer Dan Glickman is keeping in line with the old Valenti way of thinking as smoking on-screen will now become a factor in determining ratings. According to the geniuses at the movie behavior police headquarters, keeping youngsters from seeing smoking on the big screen will discourage use of tobacco. Never mind that instances of smoking declined in their recent two year assessment of movies, and that no causal link has ever been established with any media that behavior has been influenced as a direct result of exposure – they’re hot on introducing more stupidly worded warnings to films like "glamorized smoking" or "pervasive smoking” (although nothing will ever beat “vampire violence”).

They can rate movies all they want and restrict admittance to no avail, because there’s nothing keeping kids from seeing it on TV, or worse, in real life where real peer pressure and decisions are made. The puritans at the MPAA still think that people emulate what they see in films and in the media, which is why I started an underground fight club and went to work for a demanding women’s fashion magazine editor even though I was just a simple girl at heart.