Pump Action

As idiot email chain forwarders would remind you, today is Don’t Pump Gas Day. The idea is that not going and filling up your car for a day is going to learn them mean ol’ oil barons for being greedy. Except it’s not going to effect them at all.

Here’s the offending spam:

DON'T PUMP GAS ON MAY 15TH

In April 1997, there was a "gas out" conducted nationwide in protestof gas prices. Gasoline prices dropped 30 cents a gallon overnight.On May 15th 2007, all internet users are to not go to a gas station in protest of high gas prices. Gas is now over $3.00 a gallon in most places.There are 73,000,000+ American members currently on the internet network, and the average car takes about 30 to 50 dollars to fill up.If all users did not go to the pump on the 15th, it would take $2,292,000,000.00 (that's almost 3 BILLION) out of the oil companies pockets for just one day, so please do not go to the gas station on May 15th and lets try to put a dent in the Middle Eastern oil industry for at least one day.

First of all, if you need to gas up your car, not going to today and doing it tomorrow doesn’t change the amount of money they make – it just changes the day which they get it. Second, oil companies feel hardly anything at the street level. Almost all gas stations are franchised or privately operated entities, and the moms and pops who run them make little on the gas itself anyway. Their profit is on the goodies at the convenience store, much the same way movie theaters make their profit on concessions and not ticket sales. Third, Chevron, Shell, 76, ExxonMobil -- while they have operations in the Middle East, daily domestic oil production is still greater than Iraq, Kuwait, and the UAE combined.

And finally, most misleading of all, the totals. The average gas price in April 1997 was $1.24, and they’re claiming it took a 25% drop overnight? After the both Gulf wars began prices didn’t take that much of a pitch -- and the US controlled the flow of oil! Also, this stupidly figures that every person with an internet connection not only has a car, but also would not need to fill it today. There’s better chances you’d get bitten by a shark while winning the lottery during a lightning strike. Plus I love that 2.2 billion is almost 3 billion too. I’m 5’10, but you know, that’s almost 7 feet tall. NBA look out!

If you feel prices are too high, a one day boycott is not going to change it as you return to your regular habits no more than a one day diet is going to help you lose weight. I hope that anybody who forwarded this lame ass and poorly thought out chain spam has their car keyed.