Thine Enemy Defeated

With my Kings out of the postseason (since around the halfway point), only one thing would bring me happiness:

The Anaheim Ducks ousted from the playoffs.

While I have little love for Dallas, the enemy of my enemy is my friend, and the Stars killed any hope of a repeat cup victory for the Mighty Ducks (not that it was expected by other, more respectable sports prognosticators). The choke artists Dallas hadn’t won a playoff series since the first-rounder against Edmonton in 2003 and hadn’t closed a winning round at home since the conference finals all the way back in 2000. The Ducks are the fifth straight defending Stanley Cup champions to fail to make the second round.

Especially pleasant is the failure for Scott Niedermayer, last year’s postseason MVP, who retired then decided to return to chase another Cup. "It’s disappointing because we believe we could do better.” Y'think so? The same goes for Teemu Selanne, who sat over half the season out pondering retirement. “I think we didn’t do things as good as we could," he said, with the aplomb of a man who took an extra four months off and played half as many games as his teammates. You'd both be less douchey if you'd just stayed away all year or showed up with everybody else on day one. But no...couldn't be happy going out on top.

Enjoy the rest of the playoffs, boys. On the sideline.