These Would Have Made Nolan's Trilogy A Bit Different

Comic Album Homages

See them all here...

Weekend Edition

Counting down the top 20 links we didn't cover during the week...

20 • McLaren P1 Claims Mantle Of World’s Ultimate Supercar - It's a pretty sweet mantle.  And fast too.

19 • Why Frank Kelly Freas Was Possibly The Greatest Science Fiction Artist Who Ever Lived - Retro sci-f, FTW.

18 •  Fraternity Raises Money For Member’s Sexual Reassignment Surgery - She's becoming a he, and frat boys are always looking for members who they can have towel-snapping shower room shenanigans.

17 • The World Needs These Star Wars And Indiana Jones Versions Of Donkey Kong - If only they were playable and not art...

16 • 13 Instances When It's Perfectly Okay To Use The C-Word - Fourteen if you count making a joke.

15 • Mind Melds Move From Science Fiction To Science In Rats - Now they can share thoughts of cheese...or product testing.

14 • UNC Student Faces Possible Expulsion For Speaking Out About Alleged Sexual Assault - Because no good deed goes unpunished.

13 • Hipster Bulldog Gains Cult Following - We live in a world where 84,000 people find a dog in costume worthy of following.  Ugh...

12 • Milwaukee Brewers Racing Italian Sausage Costume Returned To Wisconsin Bar - The town was at a standstill until that wiener casing was found.

11 •  Scientist Stumbles Onto A Cure For Color Blindness - No word on fixing color deafness though...

10 • Joe Flacco, Baltimore Ravens Reach Agreement, According To Source - And now he's the most overpaid QB in the league.  One bowl championship in a contract year and you can make more than Brady, Rodgers, Brees, and the Manning of your choice.

09 • The World's Smallest ARM Chip Is Going To Be Inside You - Soon, your pills will be more than just 1000mg of vitamin C.

08 • Ghana's Turkson Is Irish Bookmakers' Favorite For New Pope - Just think what a black Pope will do to people's minds!

07 • Wonder Woman Fan Film Shows Us What The TV Show Could Have Been - Another blow to DC and their attempt to duplicate Marvel magic, where the fans outdo the billion-dollar studios.

06 • ‘Executive Chef’ At Camden, New Jersey Charter School Makes $95,000 A Year - In a city filled with crime, there's still some white collars getting away with it too.

05 • This Black Hole Spins At (Almost) The Speed Of Light - Not bad for something that weighs more than two million times more than our sun.

04 • Miss Delaware Teen USA Resigns After Porno Surfaces / Miss Teen Delaware Lies Like A Porn Star - Yeah, she says it wasn't her and resigned anyway...and then the damning evidence came out.

03 • Damon Lindelof Hilariously Goes Off On Justin Bieber's Hat On Twitter - The hat was epic...an epic awful choice.

02 • This Insane 400,000-Piece Lego Hogwarts School Is Larger Than Harry Potter Himself - I do not know from the seven books, but Legos I get, and 400,000 of them are impressive.

01 • Florida Man Swallowed By Sinkhole Under Bedroom - Yes, the most Florida of all headlines.

Of All the Comic Creators, Why Not Rob Liefeld?

Veteran comic book scribe Peter David, who penned many acclaimed story lines on such books as X-Factor and The Incredible Hulk, has been sidelined by a stroke.

He broke the news on his blog , writing "I cannot see properly and I cannot move my right arm or leg." A later post explained what occurred while the writer was on vacation. "We have a diagnosis, which is a small stroke in the Pons section of his brain," which is the main point for the nerves that control movement and balance within the body. His wife added he has "lost most of the use of his right arm, his right leg is incredibly weak, the vision in his right eye is blurry, and the right side of his face is drooping slightly" Aside from those Marvel comics, he also worked on DC's Young Justice and Aquaman, and numerous Star Trek novels.

Seriously, Rob Liefeld is shitty and would have been a fair trade so that Peter David could continue on un-afflicted. I love his run on the Hulk book, and one of my favorite stories of all time is the off-beat, stand-alone tale in issue 335, where the above picture comes from. Get well soon, Peter...and Liefeld, stop working on comics.

Doctor Sonic

No, it's not a new Sega game, but the name of a construction paper artist who makes Marvel comics characters.

Weekend Edition

Counting down the top 20 links we didn't cover during the week...

20 • The 'Breaking Bad' Porn Parody Now Has A Trailer - You're nothing in pop culture history until there's a porn version.

19 • Man Mauled To Death By Captive Grizzly In Montana / 2-Year-Old Boy Killed At PA. Zoo Exhibit / Man-Eating Leopard Devours 15 - Another installment of man versus the animal kingdom. And the animals won.

18 • Jermaine Jackson Petitions To Alter Famous Name - I'll save you the click...he wants to change it form Jackson to Jacksun. I hope the judge denies it on the grounds of go fuck yourself (that's a legal term, right?), but if not, exhibit A is that he named one of his sons Jermajesty.

17 • Anthony Bourdain Goes On A Dead-Hooker Twitter Tirade - Don't try and put your product placement in his show without permission.

16 • Rebecca Black Producer's Thanksgiving Video, With Nicole Westbrook - WARNING! This is goddamn awful. And it's going to get 30 million hits.

15 • Craigslist Ad For 'Sick Ass 1971 Honda CB350' - If this didn't belong to La Flama Blanca, then he at least wrote the ad.

14 • No Doubt Pulled Their Offensive New Video - Native Americans don't like the cowboys and Indians motif, but it's really how bland the song is that's offensive.

13 • Man Admits Murder During Heart Attack, Survives - You don't go to heaven if you admit your sins, just jail.

12 • One Colonoscopy May Be Enough For A Lifetime / Detroit Tigers Star Pleads Guilty In New York Anti-Semitic Case - A pair of stories about assholes, and how they should be dealt with.

11 • Superman's Home Planet Krypton 'Found' / USA Luge Team To Dress As X-O Manowar For 2014 Olympics - Crossover by comics into real life can be interesting, but these are a little unnecessary.

10 • McDonald's Flies American Flag Upside Down At Half-Mast In Follansbee, West Virginia - Was it a protest after the election, a call for help, or a flag malfunction? Or, because it's West Virginia just Wednesday?

09 • Voters In Washington And Colorado Legalize Recreational Marijuana - In other news, populations on adjoining states decrease as mass exodus begins to Washington and Colorado.

08 • 37 Bond Girls Then And Now - Spoiler alert! Most of them are better then than now.

07 • Woman Who Drove On Sidewalk Must Wear 'Idiot' Sign - I like creative punishments, especially when they're also honest.

06 • Ronda Rousey Becomes The First Woman In The UFC - Well, at least, the first one who'll kick your ass or knock you out. They still have those chippies in bikinis between rounds.

05 • So Long, And Thanks For All The WHOSE RESPONSIBLE THIS - Rob Bricken leaves his editor's spot at the great Topless Robot for io9...yes, I am a geek, and you should be too by checking out both sites.

04 • How Apple Avoids Paying Billions in Taxes - They ain't making record breaking profits just from selling a lot of gadgets. Because sometimes it also pays not to think differently.

03 • Scientists Make Light Travel Infinitely Fast - When light speed got a little faster.

02 • New York Man Crushed By Giant Crucifix Has Leg Amputated - Man frequently prays at church for wife. Man believes crucifix cures his wife of cancer. Crucifix decides debt needs to be repaid.

01 • Dead Pig In Romney Shirt Found At Manhattan Beach GOP Headquarters - After all months and months of election coverage in the media, this is the way I want the story it end.

Even Comics Don't Believe In Print Media

It's not just Newsweek that feels publishing is not what it used to be...

As of Superman issue 13 (which hits stores tomorrow), Clark Kent, quits the The Daily Planet, the Metropolis newspaper that has been his employer since the 1940's. Shouldn't he have received his pension already?  Yes, we could talk about reading a text message about Lois Lane and her new boyfriend, or a "new Kryptonian threat" named H'el (for the silly-titled upcoming storline "H'el On Earth" - zoinks that's clever!)

In what is supposed to be a Jerry Maguire-esque moment, and prompted by his boss and the owner of the newspaper getting on his case, Superman quits in front of the whole staff.  Writer Scott Lobdell says, "This is really what happens when a 27-year-old guy is behind a desk and he has to take instruction from a larger conglomerate with concerns that aren't really his own.  Superman is arguably the most powerful person on the planet, but how long can he sit at his desk with someone breathing down his neck and treating him like the least important person in the world?"  So when did comic books become less about capes and tights, and turn into TPS reports? 

"Clark's situation is one most any working stiff can relate to, when they've had enough and don't want to take it anymore. And the superhero, who became a journalist in the first place because he wanted to speak out on things he couldn't as Superman, has been in this awkward position of everything he's writing is certainly a shading to keep his identity secret," Lobdell added.  "Rather than Clark be this clownish suit that Superman puts on, we're going to really see Clark come into his own in the next few years as far as being a guy who takes to the Internet and to the airwaves and starts speaking an unvarnished truth - he is more likely to start the next Huffington Post or the next Drudge Report than he is to go find someone else to get assignments or draw a paycheck from." Holy shit, that is ridiculous!

After a long love affair with comics, I found myself less interested in them - though I still have a soft spot for some of those costumed characters.  And even though DC Comics tend to be shitty in comparison to Marvel (my heroes of choice), this is lame no matter who the publisher is.  I read the issue in question, and it is retarded.  There's no need for Clark Kent to be concerned about his cover identity, or paying rent in a place with buddy Jimmy Olsen when the first few pages of the story have him in a secret facility near the center of the earth bench pressing 5.972 sextillion metric tons (the approximate weight of the planet)...for five days straight.  Really.  On those opening panels alone, the rest of the story and premise for Superman to even be Clark Kent is senseless.  But hey, at least he's hip enough to see how outdated publishing is - even if unnecessarily updating the character is anything but hip.

Cap / Bucky 2012?

If you though that Obama or Romney were your only two choices at the polls this year, think again!

Apparently, good ol' Captain America is throwing his shield hat into the ring, and makes the Oval Office his new HQ. In "The Ultimates" series, set in an alternative Marvel universe, super-soldier Steve Rogers wins the presidential election as a write-in candidate .  The issue comes out next Wednesday, and writer Sam Humphries calls it the next step in the character's long role as "America's defender".  Hmmm....as a long time geek and comic reader, I call it stupid.

"Cap is answering the call of the people. This is not the first time he's stood up for an America in crisis. This is a further evolution in his role as America's defender, from soldier to superhero to president," Humphries said. "He didn't ask for this position, but if it helps him reunite America, then he'll take on the job.  He doesn't see his place as having press conferences in rose gardens, he sees his place as out in the field - this will result in a unique and thrilling presidency we've never seen before, in history or in fiction."

Um...still pretty stupid.  I loves me some Captain America, and for well over 25 years there have been all kinds of comic story lines that bordered on the silly or strange, it never sounded this ridiculous.  Yes, we have to suspend our disbelief that a guy could get a government-sized does of steroids and survive decades in suspended animation, only to throw his shield at villains while wearing star-spangled tights, but we have to draw the line somewhere.  Even in a comic book world, having the president go kick some ass instead of, well, any other proper channel of authority and legal means of justice, I'm sorry, but that's too goddamn lame.

The farthest I'll go is to accept Vladimir Putin.

Elvis Has Left The Toy Chest

Custom figures from both Marvel and DC comics and film, by Elvis 1976...

Superhero Kids

Andy Fairhurst figured out what they want to be when they grow up...

Drawn And Dressed

Calling back to a post from a few months back, now there's even more opportunity to dress like a superhero - that's been expanded to the animated realm with Cartoon Closets.

The Alternate Avengers Ending

Cosplay You Can Leave The House In

Even though we love girls in their superhero costumes, Looking MARVELous actually pairs clothing and accessories so that gals can dress in real clothing with a nod to their comic countparts.

Fossil Avengers

Avengers, Retro-cemble!

Buffy The Fetus Slayer

You know what more comic books need?  Abortion debates!

In the latest issue of Dark Horse Comics' Buffy The Vampire Slayer series - yes, that show which hasn't been on the air for almost a decade, has had what would have been it's eight and ninth "seasons" as comic books.  And in the new issue, Buffy decides to have an abortion. Hooray for the television equivalent of a very special episode!  Considering the generally undersexed idea of geeks and fanboys, isn't figuring out about what to do about having a baby getting ahead of what it takes to make one?

Show creator and executive producer Joss Whedon, who also develops the plot arcs for the comic, said, "Buffy was always about the arc of a life, and it wasn't ever going to be one of those shows where they were perpetually in high school and never asked why...It was about change. So there's never a time when Buffy's life isn't relevant." And what's more relevant than giving a character an unwanted pregnancy?

Andrew Chambliss, the comic's writer, adds that Buffy's choice was something that grew organically out of the story...like a baby that organically grows inside you. "Given the specifics of Buffy's life at this point in the season - facing a new kind of vampire threat, barely able to keep a job - it seemed like it would be dishonest for Buffy to not at least entertain the question of whether she should keep or end the pregnancy." Hold up there, buddy...it's not a real person, and they don't have to entertain shit.  You're writing them, so they can do whatever you want - just like you could have not written her as irresponsibly getting drunk and pregnant at her own party.


If you create obstacles for characters, then they obviously have to deal with them, but think about what you're really saying.  Here's a strong female character that's often referred to as part of the "Chosen Ones" who protect mankind, who has fought otherworldly forces for years, and now they're no better than some older version of 16 and Pregnant?  So, is Superman suddenly going to have a fear of heights?  Or the Punisher wakes up and becomes a pacifist?

I like Whedon and his other forays in television (Firefly, Dollhouse), and am looking forward to his film treatment of The Avengers, but I never cared at all for the Buffy show, mostly because everything on the WB is aimed for 13 year old girls. And as far as Buffy and her abortion, I don't really care if she wants to kill it or keep it, because...well, it's Buffy The Vampire Slayer.  It's the ridiculousness of the whole thing that bothers me, because something based on teenage vampire killers, lesbian witches, and fighting demons and werewolves seems suspect suddenly switching to serious subjects.  This isn't the happy-go-lucky 50s and 60s Batman losing his campy kitsch to become the dark knight of the 80s and beyond, which is the evolution of a character.  I think this is more a deliberate act to stay relevant by being edgy.  And I've seen this before, with the same unimpressive results...

Super Sniffers

The fanboy in me is super-excited about the upcoming Avengers film, but not so much about the merchandise that's being tied into it.

Just like the attempt to take any spare change for gamers while deodorizing them for the public, so is the move to bilk comic readers in a similar manner.   You may not be a superhero, but you can smell like what merchants (who also make Star Trek and Star Wars themed fragrances) think they do:

• Infinity Formula Cologne

Colonel Nicholas "Nick" Fury. Paratrooper, Ranger, Weapons and Demolitions Expert, Aircraft Specialistand Pilot, Green Beret. Veteran of every US War and Military Conflict since WWII. Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. "The single most powerful, most important organization on the planet Earth." And the only human strong enough to bring together a group of remarkable people who would fight the battles no one else could.

• Patriot Cologne

A cologne that pays homage to the confident, stand-up-to-bullies, hard working average Joe in every man. PATRIOT Cologne is both reserved and sexy; like a symbol on a shield or a moniker ona motorcycle helmet. Fresh notes of green lime and white pepper are the first to hit with dry oak wood, sandalwood and tequila accords finishing the adventure. Perfect for any time or place, PATRIOT Cologne puts the Novus Mundus in your strong, sensuous hands for you to embrace and discover.

• Mark VII Cologne

A resolutely sophisticated cologne forged from the sea, the sun, the earth, and a touch of devil-may-care whimsy. Transparent, aromatic, and modern in nature, Mark VII combines mandarin, neroli, nasturtium and jasmine layered with light patchouli to create a contemporary expression of "I don't play well with others" confidence; leaving you always ready for whatever a genius, billionaire, playboy-philanthropist might encounter along the way.

• SMASH!

Very unusual and rare materials have been brought together to create a woody aquatic cologne evoking both a serene sense of timeless freedom and a single-minded, unbridled passion for life. Yuzu, bergamot and tarragon create clean, clear top notes along with unexpected accords of water lily and nutmeg. SMASH! then carries an intense woody drydown enriched with Indian sandalwood, vetiver, musk and sharp cedar. Complimentary to a full range of emotions, it wears well no matter where-at work, the lab or an evening out on the town.

• Worthy Cologne

This woody citrus cologne is a unique, meaningful combination of bergamot, frozen ginger and wheatgrass blended with a hint of fresh natural grapefruit and layered deeply with aromatic cypress. Basenotes are possessed with sensual, seductive tones of dark amber and cedarwood, protecting and enhancing a deep, dry masculine (dare we say almost God-like?) musk.

• Mischief

Possessed of Superhuman strength, Genius-level intelligence, Mystical powers, Telepathy, Flight, Clairvoyance, Therianthropy, and Teleportation... who could blame you for becoming the greatest trickster of them all? So wear your crown of baleful maleficence with pride; let mirth and mayhem stand ready at your side, anticipating your every command. Test their mettle knowing you have nothing to fear; you are Mischief and you were made to rule.

If they really wanted to make some money, they should sell panties that smell like the Black Widow.

Deleted Scenes From X-Men First Class

Dairy Products Gone Bad

One of my favorite comic books, the violently funny Milk & Cheese, is getting the deluxe hardcover treatment, and creator by Evan Dorkin said it collects “every single stupid Milk and Cheese comic ever made from 1989 to 2010, along with a shit-ton of supplemental awesomeness.” Thankfully it comes out just in time for Christmas this year!

The “supplemental awesomeness” contain is:

• over 80 pages of comics that have not been collected before.

• a 24 page color section featuring "all the color M&C strips, a cover gallery, pin-ups, merchandise art, trading cards, etc."

• a 24 page B&W supplemental section featuring "pin-ups, t-shirt designs, and other art, etc."

• the rare 1997 M&C Special Edition 16 page mini-comic featuring the expanded “Darth Vader Overdrive” strip and extras.

Back in college, that carton of hate and wedge of spite were so badass that they couldn't ruin an evening bottle (or two) of red wine at at a gal-pal's place...I still got laid that night!

The Hidden Graphic Novel

Buy SVK and you'll get two comic for the price of one.

Written by the legendary Warren Ellis, with art by Matt "D'Israeli" Brooker, and collaborating with London design firm BERG, SVK is unlike any other comic that has been released before. The story is about a disgraced spy who has to recover a top-secret package lost by a military contractor, but it's the second story revealed in ultraviolet light that sets it apart. A small, wallet-sized UV flashlight is provided to reveal the comic-within-a-comic.

There are hidden joke ads in the real ones, as well as essay on comics as an art form (by William Gibson), augmented reality (by Jamais Cascio) and the history of novelty comics (by Paul Gravett) in SVK. It will cost you more than $20 to get the book outta England, and the first run print run is sold out, but it is unlike any comic you've seen before.