Blah Blah Gaga

We have been spared the wrath of more Lady Gaga music by the supreme Madonna-wannabe herself, having purchased her own songs at auction rather than allow them to end up released.

For an undisclosed amount, Gaga itself purchased six CDs and a DVD that her first manager, Bob Leone, was selling as part of an of over 800 assorted celebrity items. Some of the items were autographed and featured unreleased songs dating back to 2002, like a demo from the Stefani Germanotta Band (gasp! real name) The world will never enjoy the musical fruit like "Retrosexual", or generic dance like "Spin You Around" or "Yay Ha". What a shame...

Normally, Lady Gaga would not rate a post, but this is more a cautionary tale of the doom that was averted.

Hot Cakes, SON!

Space Babies, Or Dark Side Of The Poon

Sorry sextonauts, making the first baby in space baby is going to prove difficult because embryonic stem cells don't act the same way in zero gravity. So is it cyborg humans or banging aliens?

Scientist have shown how full-grown adults suffer the longer they stay in microgravity - living in zero-G causes muscles and bones to weaken, and makes the heart beat irregularly. And now, Australian researchers have found microgravity tampers with stem cells. In tests, 64% percent of stem cell proteins were fundamentally different from how they would be in normal gravity. And the changes weren't good. Most of the altered proteins would weaken bones and allow increased oxidative damage to DNA. Damage was also done to proteins involved with the immune system, proper cell division, calcium levels, and much more.

Clearly, gravity is somehow responsible for a vital part of the body's mechanical or circulatory feedback, helping to keep bones and blood vessels healthy. My layman idea? Artificial gravity! Problem solved? Perhaps, and then you can save all the zero-G sex for kinkier times...

Virus Annihilist

Rinderpest is a virus that kills cattle, and was prevalent in the Middle East, Africa and Asia. Was. Scientists believe that, except for samples in controlled laboratory conditions, they have wiped the virus out of existence. This would be only the second time in human history that a virus has been destroyed. The first was smallpox.

The UN's Food and Agriculture Organization has said that it will now suspend its efforts to track and eliminate the virus, confident it has been eradicated. When the disease first showed signs in Africa just before the 20th century, between 80% and 90% of cattle and buffalo on the continent were killed. Rinderpest killed on average seven out of 10 cattle infected with the disease until the 1960s, when Walter Plowright developed a workable vaccine.

A simple test was designed to be used by people in the field and to give reliable results within minutes, proving highly effective and leading to it being been rolled out across Africa. Experts would train locals to recognise the disease and administer vaccines, even working with nomadic tribesmen in the regions and vaccinate herds "on the move".

With Rinderpest set to be declared eradicated next year, Africa can finally focus it's efforts on cleaning up it's lesser issues: poverty, famine, and war. But really, it is the biggest veterinary achievement since Bob Barker told people to spade and neuter their pets.

Clinic? Master Class!

Bozzio killed it last night...so glad I was there.

Reality Is An Illusion

Polish photographer Jan Kriwol, who can tear through time and space (amongst other things).

Say Hey, Baby

In the world of "Hey Baby", hordes of men call out pickup lines that range from tame ("Excuse me, do you have a boyfriend?") to perverse ("I wanna lick you all over"), and game players get to decide if they want to ignore the comment or shoot. Finally, feminists can play video games!

Released in June, and available to play free on www.heybabygame.com, the game has raised some controversy on gaming blogs, as both sexes debated the validity of its message about street harassment. Must have been a short debate, especially when the tagline is "It's payback time, boys." Designed specifically for women, it's a not the typical female lead character that has been action oriented like Lara Croft (from Tomb Raider) or Samus (from the Metroid series), but more in line with the gritty violence Grand Theft Auto...and it may be the first in a new wave of games.

A study released this summer by Ghent University (in Belgium, folks) looked at 1,000 gamers between 16 and 24 to determine the difference in gaming preferences between women and men...and eventually market the shit out of some games to them. Women make up 40% of gamers and 42% of online gamers.  Of the 344 females polled in the study, more than half said they didn't mind shoot-'em-up gameplay.... as long as the violence had a humorous undertone.  Not surprisingly, realistic battle scenes tended to put women off.

Sure, it's crudely animated and fairly simple, but so was Doom when it came out.  And like all video games, it's a good release and safe outlet for those more...aggressive impulses.

Church & 30th

Traffic Blur

Gregor Thielker is a hyperrealist painter whose, recent paintings "explore the sensation of seeing from a car while driving through the rain”.

Burn In Hell, Douchebags

There is a special part of the underworld reserved for shitty musicians, but even that is too good for these jackasses.

Earlier this morning, wannabe rappers Imperial Stars blocked the 101 Freeway in Hollywood with an "impromptu concert".  Their promotion for their upcoming album, which features the song "Traffic Jam 101", consisted of parking a truck marked with advertisements across all but one lane of the freeway, and having the driver flee the scene with the keys. The group were singing and playing instruments on top of the truck. The California Highway Patrol arrested three, and were working feverishly to get all southbound lanes open again. The traffic backup extended into the San Fernando Valley.

There is a great deal of irony when a self-described "hard core hip hop band" is from Orange County, one of the most white, Republican places in the nation. On their website, the band pledges that all the money earned from the song will be going to Homeless Children America, who, if they're smart, will decline what little these retards may make, and keep their distance. I'm all for releasing the three who were arrested...as long as it's into a crowd of all the commuters who were stuck in that senseless traffic jam.

The Best Thing On The Simpsons In Years

Ballon Arms Race Escalation

The Russian military has a cunning plan to deceive their enemies and save money at the same time: inflatable weapons! I wasn't aware that Russia had enemies to intimidate anymore.  Let's hope they're not up against a nation of straight pins.

Looking just like real ones, the inflatable arms are both easy to transport and quick to deploy. The decoys are a hundred times cheaper than the real thing, which means Moscow will save a lot of money...that they ought to spend on at least a few real ones. Fitting into a black duffel bag, the large sheet looks like a tent, but when attached to a pump, the plastic begins to rise and take shape. A demonstration shows how two men can "make" a Russian tank. A second balloon expands into a S-300 rocket launcher, complete with giant truck and inflatable rockets. Eventually, they will blow up MiG fighter jets and an entire Russian radar station.

The inflatables are stitched together at a former hot-air balloon factory. These state-of-the-art stand-ins are among the most advanced military decoys in the world, and much lighter and manageable than the rubber versions used in World War II - though terrible in an actual firefight. Their main asset are that they are made of a special material that tricks enemy radar and thermal imaging into thinking they are real weapons. "I'm proud to be making entire rocket-launchers and tanks for our armed forces," says a female worker who is stitching a surface-to-air missile system. "When you finish sewing them and you watch them being filled with air, it's so satisfying."  She did not comment though if the balloon arms made her feel any safer.

Around The Rink On Opening Weekend

The best story out of the 2010 NHL debut weekend is the come from behind win by the Kings against last year's playoff nemesis Vancouver Canucks.

Justin Williams tied the game on a power play with 4:05 left, and a shootout goal by Anze Kopitar - who came back after taking a stick to the face in the second period that required 18 stitches, sealed the win in season opener, 2-1. It was a great end to an evening that started with a lengthy pregame celebration of the Canucks’ 40th anniversary. The Canucks played their first NHL game against the Kings, and both teams wore vintage jerseys as a throwback to that game decades prior. In addition to the win, it was the first game for defenseman Willie Mitchell against his former team, who he last play with on January 16, where he sustained a season-ending concussion.

Next, I take a lot of joy in seeing that Dallas Stars forward Mike Ribeiro was arrested for misdemeanour public intoxication at a local restaurant Sunday night. Ribeiro scored the winning goal in a shootout against the New York Islanders, giving his team their first 2-0 start since 2006.  While talented, he's a cocky prick who runs his mouth during games, and it looks like karma got tired of hearing him carry on.  Being in our division, it's also good to see any troubles befall our rivals.  There won't be jail time, but any extra distraction to keep our opponents off their mark is helpful, and I'll enjoy heckling him when they come to town.

And finally, the price the New Jersey Devils paid for Ilya Kovalchuk has caught up with them!

Due to injuries (defenseman Anton Volchenkov's broken nose from and Brian Rolston's lower body injury) and suspensions (Pierre-Luc Letourneau-Leblond with his automatic one-game rest for instigating a fight in the final five minutes of a game), the Devils are struggling to field a full squad on the ice and unable to replace those players due to the financial constraints of the salary cap. Tonight they'll have to play with only nine forwards, along with six defenseman and two goaltenders -and for a home game against the Pittsburgh Penguins.  And it's probably not going to be the last time.

Coach John MacLean insisted his hands aren't tied with a reduced roster, but it appears to be the culmination of seasons of cap mismanagement catching up to GM Lou Lamoriello.  And the roster / cap issue will linger once players on the long-term injured reserve return, forcing a move to get the team under the cap.  The team, which didn't make any moves in the off-season due to the vigorous pursuit of Kovalchuk, will now reap what they have sown.  Kudos again to Kings GM Dean Lombardi for not putting one player before the team.

"I Killed Cancer"

Childrens Hospital rules.

Dead (And Dumb) Presidents

A new report found that over 89,000 stimulus payments of $250 each went to people who were either dead or in prison. Money well spent!

The payments were part of last year's massive economic recovery package, meant to increase consumer spending and stimulate the economy.  But how can you do that when $18 million went to nearly 72,000 people who were dead? Worse, little more than half of those payments were returned. An additional $4.3 million went to more than 17,000 prison inmates.  Most of the inmates were eligible to get the payments because they were newly incarcerated and had been receiving Social Security before they were locked up.

The $250 payments were sent to about 52 million people who receive either Social Security or Supplemental Security Income, at a cost of about $13 billion, and for the most part were a success...aside for this very public error. A Social Security spokesman said, "Inaccurate payments are unacceptable. Social Security's Recovery Act payments were 99.8% accurate and we quickly collected the majority of the inaccurate payments. Each year we make payments to a small number of deceased recipients usually because we have not yet received reports of their deaths."

The inspector general for the Social Security Administration has been performing an audit to make sure no checks went to ineligible recipients (and they were!). This report was dated September 24, and noted that people were eligible for payments if they were getting benefits during any one of the three months before the law was passed in February 2009. The report suggested that if similar payments are authorized in the future, prison inmates should be ineligible and the government should be able to recover payments made to dead people. Naturally, the SSA agreed with the recommendations.

The Hammer Falls

Not that I wasn't his champion when he was enforcing for our team, but now that he's moved on, I'm totally okay with Raitis Ivanans (now a Calgary Flame) getting pummeled by Steve MacIntyre on opening night. That bodes well for when we play Calgary on Sunday, right?

iProblem (Again)

Last week, the free iPhone 4 bumper program finished...so everything is happy and good in Appleland, yeah? Nope. Ryan Block was one of the first to report that the iPhone engineering team has discovered another major design flaw.

Gizmodo, who also raised concerns over the iPhone 4's glass back, validates Block's findings that non-bumper cases which slide onto the iPhone 4 can cause scratching (when particles get between the case and the glass), and those scratches can lead to serious cracking.  Basically, if somebody puts a slider case on their phone, there's a possibility the next time they pull the phone out, the back will be completely busted as a result of the design flaw. It's a big enough issue that Apple is blocking all third-party cases from the Apple Store until this week, even ones certified "made for iPhone." And the rumor is Apple's engineering team has built a lab and test program just to examine this problem.

Apple's "solution" of pulling the cases from their shelves screws manufacturers who are paying Apple a cut (possibly up to 10-15%) to get the "Made for iPhone" badge - which allows their cases to be sold in Apple Stores.  It's possible the products may not end up back in Apple Stores at all - and Apple's not telling the manufacturers when or if that will happen. The cases are still being sold elsewhere, for those who want to amplify the problem.

In hindsight, the iPhone 4's antenna flaw coupled with the replacement bumper case design makes more sense - there's no contact with the glass back, and it covers the iPhone 4's antenna.  You can bet the next iPhone with not have a glass back or a weak spot in the antenna.


UPDATE:  Now there's data to support the cracked glass theory.

Not So Fab Four

The Glee cast has surpassed the Beatles for the most appearances on the Billboard Hot 100 chart by a non-solo act. Finally, a real musical legacy has been established!

The cast of the series added six debuts to the chart this week, making a total of 75 songs on the chart to the Beatles' 71.  The show's soundtrack got a boost after this week's episode featuring the music of Britney Spears. Elvis Presley still leads overall with 108 songs, followed by James Brown with 91, and then Glee. The Beatles are now sixth, behind Ray Charles and Aretha Franklin. Songs from Elton John, Lil Wayne, Stevie Wonder and Jay-Z round out the Top 10.

Warming Glow nailed it with both their photoshop and commentary:

Just pay attention to the eye-catching headline, people. No need for context.

So there you have it: irrefutable evidence that a television show that makes covers of hit songs is more influential and successful than the band that defined a generation and changed rock and roll. Again, there’s no need to give this any kind of analysis or critical thought. “Glee’s” bigger than the Beatles. End of discussion. Move along now.

Amen.

Die Evil

They're Next Door To The First Church Of Christ Computer Programmer*

The American Civil Liberties Union has filed a lawsuit filed claiming that a North Carolina school violated the constitutional rights of a 14-year-old student by suspending her for wearing a nose piercing. Wait - 14-year-old are still in school in North Carolina?

The lawsuit seeks a court order allowing Ariana Iacono to "return immediately" to Clayton High School, which has kept her on suspension for four weeks since classes started. The complaint hinges on Iacono's claim that her nose piercing is more than fashion, but an article of faith. She and her mother, Nikki, belong to a (very) small religious group called the Church of Body Modification, that sees tattoos, piercings and other adornment as channels to the divine. Holy nasal studs? I'm still not on board with the Shroud of Turin being a significant religious relic.

"This is a case about a family's right to send a 14-year-old honor student to public school without her being forced to renounce her family's religious beliefs," wrote lawyers from the ACLU in response to the Johnston County school system's dress code. It bans facial piercings, short skirts, sagging pants, "abnormal hair color" and other items deemed distracting or disruptive. The loophole is the dress code also allows for exemptions based on "sincerely held religious belief," and says, "the principal or designees shall not attempt to determine whether the religious beliefs are valid, but only whether they are central to religious doctrine and sincerely held." No questions there, right?

Wrong. Ariana Iacono has been suspended four times since fall classes started, missing 19 out of 28 school days so far. The school system denied an appeal of her most recent suspension, and told her she'd have to attend South Campus Community School, an alternative facility for students with disciplinary and other problems - the dreaded continuation school! And she still wouldn't be allowed to wear the nose piercing in the other school.

The suit states officials repeatedly dismissed explanations of the Iaconos' faith by the family and their Raleigh minister. "We followed all the rules, so I don't understand why the school is being so unreasonable," Nikki said. "The dress code policy allows for a religious exemption, and I explained to the principal and various school officials how my daughter's nose stud is essential to the expression of our family's religious values." Nikki Iacono (32 - of course), joined the Church of Body Modification in 2009, and her daughter followed a year later.

It's a pretty silly dress code, compounded by the even sillier and flimsy "religion". But while it holds little water, the school district is not following their own regulations. If they really want to focus their attention on the issues, they ought to work on keeping 18 year olds from having kids when they receive a diploma, and not getting caught up in goofy sects.


* a Paranoia reference - zing!

Weezer Sucks

There's a growing opinion that Weezer has not been able to replicate the quality and songcraft of their debut album, and that each successive album has been worse than the last.  But James Burns hates Weezer so much, he's trying to raise enough money to get them to stop making music altogether.

Recently, Burns launched an online fundraiser to collect $10 million in hopes of sending Weezer to early retirement, The (Seattle) Stranger reported. Despite only raising $2000 to this point, the movement isn't so much about his own feelings for the band, but rather the anguish Weezer has cause their followers. "This isn't about me. This is about Weezer fans," Burns wrote on the website. "This is an abusive relationship, and it needs to stop now. I am tired of my friends being disappointed year after year."

Drummer Patrick Wilson jokingly responded to raise the stakes.  "If they can make it to 20, we'll do the 'deluxe breakup!'". The Stranger interviewed Burns, and he said he'll try and go the distance to raise the money. And as for angry reactions to his fundraising, Burns claims he doesn't mind.  "I am not afraid of Weezer fans," Burns said. "I can take it. Besides, I'm doing this mostly for them."

Weezer's latest album arrives in early November, so he'll have to step it up if he's going to stop that release.

UPDATE: Looks like Jimmy has gone all soft and weak - like Weezer, album after album. He posted the following:

Hey, I’m going to break character here for a minute, okay? Okay. The amount of attention this thing has gotten is unreal. I expected to ruffle a few feathers, but this is pretty insane. So, I’ll be shutting this campaign down at noon on Monday.

Why?

Well, I didn’t raise $10 Million, and Weezer are still a band, but I accomplished everything I ever hoped to.  I figured since the internet wasted so much of my time with all the ridiculous articles about the new Weezer album, I thought I’d return the favor and waste some of the internet’s time. Boy howdy, did I succeed. So in case there was any doubt (and if there was, all I can say is that you’re dumber than me) that this campaign was anything more than a giant piss-take, I’ll leave you with these last words: I did it for the lulz.
toodle pip,
James

The Date's Over When He Finds Out It's His Sister

Putting The Old In GOP

Sen. Jim DeMint said that even though no one publicly came to his defense in 2004 after he preached that gay people and unwed mothers should be banned from teaching, "everyone" privately told him not to back down from his position.  C'mon, don't you have some distain for blacks and Muslims, too?

DipShit DeMint heavily implied that not banning gay people and women who have sex with before marriage from teaching was an attack on Christians.  Given the incredible hypocracy that the right wing demonstrates with gays and pre-marital sex, I'd say the attack is mostly on their credibility. The ultra-conservative, close-minded official brought the issue back into the spotlight when he spoke at the Greater Freedom Rally at First Baptist Church in North Spartanburg, South Carolina, which is a total oxymoron considering the words "freedom" are in the same sentence as "Baptist" and "South Carolina".

In line with his "personal beliefs," he also felt that local school boards should be able to decide whether to discriminate against gay and unwed pregnant teachers.  And did he state his position on whether sexually active unmarried male teachers should be similarly removed from classrooms? Uh, no...because what's wrong with that?

One of his spin doctors said whether or not gay people should be banned from the classroom isn't an issue on DeMint's agenda as a Senate member. "Senator DeMint believes that hiring decisions at local schools are a local school board issue, not a federal issue...he was making a point about how the media attacks people for holding a moral opinion."  So to recap, even if you're an antiquated bigot you can still share your opinions, as long as you pretend that you're not in a position to enforce them.  And shame on the media for holding an elected official to any standard!

His election rival is long-shot Democratic candidate Alvin Greene, so DeMint can really hit the gas with his crazy bullshit, since it would take setting a bus full of retarded orphans on fire to cause trouble for him at the polls.  He really is a man of the people...and I can't believe those people also get to vote. I think there's really only a decade or two left for most of these Republicans who didn't get hip to the social revolution of the 60's, and then when they're dead, the problem will just be reconciling the misdirection of plain stupid folks, not the backwards, old school thinking that been dying for nearly 50 years.

Hungry For Savings

Costco, who will sell anything in bulk, is looking to save you a trip back to their warehouse.

Enter the 1-year supply of dehydrated and freeze-dried food. Yes, it's 5,011 servings from Shelf Reliance, who give you 84 pastel colored gallon cans of "food" that will not go bad for years! The 12 month food supply for one (or 6 months two, 3 months for four....), will arrive in 14 separate boxes. Simple rehydration instructions, recipes, and helpful tips are included on each can!

It includes:

Grains

• 8 Cans of Instant White Rice (48 servings per can)

• 12 Cans of Hard White Winter Wheat (44 servings per can)

• 3 Cans of 6 Grain Pancake Mix (50 servings per can)

• 2 Cans of Elbow Macaroni (45 servings per can)

Vegetables
• 6 Cans of Dehydrated Potato Chunks (42 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Sweet Corn (46 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Green Peas (41 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Dehydrated Chopped Onions (45 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Mushroom Pieces (48 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Broccoli (47 servings per can)

Fruits
• 2 Cans of Organic Apple Slices (48 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Blueberries (50 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Freeze-Dried Blackberries (49 servings per can)
• 2 Cans of Freeze-Dried Raspberries (48 servings per can)

Dairy

• 6 Cans of Powdered Milk (43 servings per can)
• 3 Cans of Chocolate Drink Mix (48 servings per can)

Proteins/Beans
The taste and texture of TVP (Textured Vegetable Protein) is consistent with real meat, making it a great addition to vegetarian diets
• 3 Cans of Bacon TVP (47 servings per can)
• 3 Cans of Beef TVP (44 servings per can)
• 3 Cans of Chicken TVP (45 servings per can)
• 2 Cans of Taco TVP (42 servings per can)
• 6 Cans of Pinto Beans (49 servings per can)
• 1 Can of Black Beans (49 servings per can)
• 2 Cans of Lima Beans (49 servings per can)
• 3 Cans of Lentils (52 servings per can)
• 6 Cans of Whole Eggs (236 servings per can)

Cooking Basics
• 2 Cans of White Sugar (46 servings per can)

The freeze-dried foods have a shelf life of up to 25 years, dehydrated foods have a shelf life of up to 15 years, grains and rice have a shelf life of up to 30 years. And, if you don't believe it's good for you (or at least, not bad), here's the nutritional content. Also, might I suggest you also get a collapsible rain barrel or two? You're going to need some water for those meals...

Wingman

Making The Grid

There could be a familiar high-performance automotive manufacturer in the paddock soon...

Porsche chairman Matthias Müller hinted the legendary German car company might return to F1 for the first time in more than two decades.

Volkswagen-owned Porsche last appeared in 1991 as an engine-supplier to the Footwork team.  The last factory-backed team success was more than three decades earlier, when the team won the 1962 French Grand Prix.   In 2013, the rules are are expected to allow a 1.6-litre powerplant, which is probably of interest to Porsche. Earlier this year, Audi hinted they did not fit "on a technological basis", inferring that if one of VW’s two flagship brands was to join the grid, it will likely be Porsche.

Müller admits that having VW's two rival brands competing in the same championship - even though they're basically different classes of sportscars, would not be favorable.  But seeing Porsche or Audi come into the race game would be excellent. Lamborghini, c'mon and get involved...

Mechanimals

Roland Tamayo's paintings are currently on display at Gallery 1988...kinda reminds me of the Echo Location album art from MAGNA.
 

Paging Saul Bass

We're Sorry

It's never too late to let folks know that you're taking responsibility for your actions.

First, with a final payment of £59.5 million (ouch, they had to pay in native currency), Germany can write off their debt for starting one world war that laid the foundations for another. It only took 90 years to cough up the reparations put upon them by the Treaty of Versailles. It was established as compensation to Belgium and France, and to pay back the Allies some of the costs of the war.

The initial sum agreed upon for war damages in 1919 was 226 billion Reichsmarks, but was later reduced to 132 billion (or £22 billion at the time). And if not for that douche Hitler who reneged on payment, would have been settled much earlier. Most of the money goes to private individuals, pension funds and corporations holding debenture bonds as agreed under the Treaty, and Germany was made to sign the 'war guilt' clause, accepting blame for the war.

On a less cheerful and fiscally prosperous note, the United States apologized for an experiment conducted in the 1940s where government researchers deliberately infected Guatemalan prison inmates, women and mental patients with syphilis. What, like they weren't going to get it sooner or later anyway? Besides, there's no better lab rats than a third world country when testing a then-new drug like penicillin, where inmates were infected by prostitutes and later treated with the antibiotic to see it's effectiveness.

The experiment, which is similar to the 1960s Tuskegee study in which black American men were deliberately left untreated for syphilis, was revealed by a professor following up on a book about Tuskegee. In total, 696 men and women were exposed to the disease and then offered penicillin. The studies ran from 1946 to 1948, and records suggest that despite intentions, not everyone was probably cured. The link was made through Dr. John C. Cutler, a Public Health Service physician who would later be part of the Tuskegee study.

The Assistant U.S. Secretary of State for Western Hemisphere Affairs - which is an actual position in our government, said it was not yet clear whether any compensation would be offered. That's because it's questionable that any of the people who were experimented upon could be traced...and I'm sure that will be a very thorough investigation.

Enter The Credits

The Thighmaster reviewed it, but whether or not you care to see the film, at least you had your face melted a little by the opening credits.