After nine months, Paris Hilton and Benji Madden have broken up. Expect a spike in the cases of herpes outbreaks.A Hilton publicist said Wednesday that the two "remain very good friends", but who cares what they are to each other. To me, they're usless people, who at least had the chance of disappearing off the public radar together. Now they're both running free, and not in that good, Iron Maiden way. In the past Hilton and Madden had been photographed wearing rings with each other's initials, and she joined her boyfriend on tour with my mortal enemies, Good Charlotte., for whom Madden plays guitar, and his identical(ly lame) twin brother Joel is the lead singer. The web of lameness is broadened by the fact Joel Madden has a daughter with Nicole Richie, Hilton's longtime friend and reality-TV co-star.
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