A new feature, regarding my Netflix consumption - because you can't pirate every movie...
I watched two flicks last week that merit talking about, in this case, so that you don't watch them. First, Eagle Vs. Shark, or as it should be called Napoleon Kiwimite. If that movie never came out, perhaps having quirky characters who become endearing after their initial un-likeability might fly, but it doesn't. And no matter how many "goofy" elements they include, from ugly tracksuits to training for a fight, it smacks of unoriginality.
Lily is a mousy fast food worker who lives for the dorklord Jarrod, and finally angles an exchange (she takes his order) when he comes in for his daily meal. With an invitation to his costume party that he asks her to give to an uninterested co-worker, she shows up and impresses him with her video fighting game skills. Their relationship begins, and she goes to his hometown to meet his family, where more quirky hi-jinx occur. The trouble is Jarrod is a totally unlikeable creep. A selfish, self absorbed geek, you wish you could punch him in the face for his obnoxious jerkiness. And it doesn't help me at all that he's played by one of the guys from Flight Of The Conchords, aka Kiwi Tenacious D.
I watched two flicks last week that merit talking about, in this case, so that you don't watch them. First, Eagle Vs. Shark, or as it should be called Napoleon Kiwimite. If that movie never came out, perhaps having quirky characters who become endearing after their initial un-likeability might fly, but it doesn't. And no matter how many "goofy" elements they include, from ugly tracksuits to training for a fight, it smacks of unoriginality.
Lily is a mousy fast food worker who lives for the dorklord Jarrod, and finally angles an exchange (she takes his order) when he comes in for his daily meal. With an invitation to his costume party that he asks her to give to an uninterested co-worker, she shows up and impresses him with her video fighting game skills. Their relationship begins, and she goes to his hometown to meet his family, where more quirky hi-jinx occur. The trouble is Jarrod is a totally unlikeable creep. A selfish, self absorbed geek, you wish you could punch him in the face for his obnoxious jerkiness. And it doesn't help me at all that he's played by one of the guys from Flight Of The Conchords, aka Kiwi Tenacious D.
If you're able to forget about Nappy D and the fact that it is superior in every way, Eagle Vs. Shark is possibly watchable.
The other film I saw was entirely by mistake. As I love me some zombie movies, I though I had added to my list Prom Of The Dead - and boy was I wrong on that selection. Rather than a teenage zombie prom horror comedy, I ended up with part of a shitty horror anthology by the guy who did Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Dance Of The Dead takes place after a biological attack destroyed the nation, and gothic punks basically turned half the cities into badlands. Although cute, naive Anna goes to the dark side of town against her mother's wishes, the badboys are comically not that tough or scary. Jak (oh so future punk cool spelling) is a skinny twerp, and Boxx (wtf?) looks like Jack Black's brother. At the Doom Room, the (barely) living dead are paraded out, pumped full of blood, and electrified to twitch in the titular manner. It's a waste of an hour, unless you want to see gratuitous fake tits and a hardly surprise twist that Anna's long thought dead sister is one of the dead at the club.
The other film I saw was entirely by mistake. As I love me some zombie movies, I though I had added to my list Prom Of The Dead - and boy was I wrong on that selection. Rather than a teenage zombie prom horror comedy, I ended up with part of a shitty horror anthology by the guy who did Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Dance Of The Dead takes place after a biological attack destroyed the nation, and gothic punks basically turned half the cities into badlands. Although cute, naive Anna goes to the dark side of town against her mother's wishes, the badboys are comically not that tough or scary. Jak (oh so future punk cool spelling) is a skinny twerp, and Boxx (wtf?) looks like Jack Black's brother. At the Doom Room, the (barely) living dead are paraded out, pumped full of blood, and electrified to twitch in the titular manner. It's a waste of an hour, unless you want to see gratuitous fake tits and a hardly surprise twist that Anna's long thought dead sister is one of the dead at the club.
Yawn (of the dead).
1 comment:
sonuvabeyotchka! you love zombie flicks? either i never knew, or wasn't listening. Me too! i've seen dance of the dead. but not heard of prom of the dead. hmm. I really liked Diary of the Dead, thought it his best since Dawn of the Dead. Love a good/bad zombie flick. You might get a kick out of Fido, if you haven't seen it.
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