If You're Truly An Asshole

You must've seen at least one book titled something like "This book will teach you how to earn $1 million," or seen those flyers how to make tons of money just by working at home. Totally legit, and they work...yeah, sure.

Now, picture an iPhone application that has just two functions: a red jewel icon that "always reminds you (and others when you show it to them) that you were able to afford this," and, after pressing the "(i)", a secret mantra that "may help to you stay rich, healthy and successful." Did we mention it costs $999.99.

Yes, not only are you a tool who had to be sheep like cutting edge and have an iPhone, but you had spare loot to buy some of the hundreds of available iPhone Apps available to "enhance" it. Games, gadgets, software - that I understand, but this? Totally pointless. It's creator, Armin Heinrich, deserves paralysis. Or worse. If cell phones do give you cancer, let us find out when he gets it. Hear my prayer, o' mighty lord!