Bum's Knee

Jose Canseco got the bitch end of the stick in his debut in mixed martial arts, as he deserves.

He was defeated by South Korean super heavyweight Hong Man Choi by a knockout just 1 minute, 17 seconds into the first round. The referee stopped the fight when the 7'2", 330-pound Choi knocked Canseco to the mat and started punching his head. Me, I would have let it go for another minute. "That's a big man," Canseco said after the fight. "I ran into one of his left jabs and that almost knocked me out. You have no idea how scary it was facing a man that big." Funny, that's what your ex-wife said in regards to dealing with your roid rage.

Canseco did land the first blow with a right to the upper body of Choi but that was all the damage he could inflict on the Korean giant, who was built like brick kimchee shithouse. Shortly into the fight, Canseco claims to have hurt his right knee and was unable to do much after that, which is a convenient excuse for getting whupped. "I hurt my knee back home real bad but I didn't want to disappoint the fans," Canseco said. "I knew that at some point during the fight my knee was going to give out and once I was down I knew I wasn't going to get up. He's just too heavy to move." I think it was that massive left jab that may have been the issue more than the trick knee, but anybody who can punch you in the face so hard you hurt your knee is a superior opponent.

Canseco may have hit 462 home runs in 17 seasons in the major leagues, but has had little success in his numerous fights, and has never taken on professional fighters like Choi, who improved to 2-2 in MMA. He boxed Danny Bonadouchebag Bonaduce to a draw in a celebrity match in January, and lost to former Philadelphia Eagle Vai Sikahema in his first foray into celebrity boxing.

By his own acknowledgment, the baseball outcast who named alleged steroid abusers like himself in his two books needs money, and the main reason why Canseco has accepted a wide variety of offbeat jobs to make ends meet. With his record, he'll be bending over for a sawbuck in the alley soon. Canseco said he will work on getting his knee back in shape before taking on any more fights, even though it's only going to be an issue until it's healthy and then he'll find some other excuse. "I have no idea if I'll do this again," Canseco said. "I've gotta get better before I commit to anything like this". Yes, much better.