Where Is His Pal, South Beach Rico?

Afghanistan elections? World Series? Health care reform? No. The only thing that matters in this world is Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken.

While thought to be an elaborate joke (on good taste?), the doll is very real - as real as the Bermuda shorts and sissy boy puppy breed it comes with. And a Mattel spokeswoman has indeed confirmed the doll as 100% authentic, and, in addition, explained the horrible, depraved story behind the toy's name to the New York Post: "The 'Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken' is actually part of the adult Barbie Collector Line," the spokeswoman said. "It is targeted toward adults." Sure, that giant market of adults who are looking for dolls with alternative lifestyles.

Of course, the "Sugar Daddy" title refers to an older man with a younger lover (and in this case a twink?), but Mattel says that there's a much more innocent explanation (waiting for the wink wink...): "The little dog's name is actually Sugar," said the Mattel spokeswoman. "That's where the name comes from. He's Sugar's daddy, as a reference to the dog."

So...Ken lives in Palm Beach and has a dog named Sugar, and we're not supposed to think that he's a gay hustler? There must be a room full of Mattel execs laughing their asses off that the joke went this far. I can see if Ken wanted to slip a little E into Skipper's friend's Red Bull and vodkas to get the party started, but prancing around in pastels and with his canine gay magnet is taking the Sugar Daddy thing into uncharted territory. And with that admission from Mattel, there's no denying that Ken is down for something other than Barbie.