Showing posts with label Cthulhu. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cthulhu. Show all posts

Thursday, March 22, 2012

The Deep Ones From The Great Lakes?

Police, residents and experts are baffled by the origin of mysterious booms and shaking that have been plaguing the 5,000 residents of Clintonville, Wisconsin for the last three days.  There may be a hint in the picture...

 The Clintonville Police Department said they have received over 250 calls about noises from underground shaking homes in the northeast corner of the town, which is near Green Bay.  "I think we can rule out that standard earthquake activity, [that] some swarm of earthquakes is happening in that region. It also really looks like it's not connected to, say, unusual drilling activity or some other kind of real obvious human induced signal," said Harold Tobin, a geoscience professor at the University of Wisconsin.

He says it does appear the sounds are either coming from the surface of the ground or just underneath the surface, but they must continue to study the phenomenon. The city has so far managed to rule out problems with the water and sewer system, elevated gas levels, area blasting or mining, industrial businesses, and even military operations. 

I'm sticking with the Elder Gods as the cause.  I do hope they do spare the state until after September...Scarlett and I have put a lot of time into our wedding.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Delicious Ones


Props to Jason McKittrick, who plays tribute to the Ancient Ones in the tastiest of manners. 
From the depths of R'lyeh comes an idol of Cthulhu cast in solid green milk chocolate! I am doing a limited production run of these for a short time only. If you would like one (or a few) please follow the paypal link. Each idol is $10. I will combine shipping for multiple orders.

Idol measures 1 inch by 1 inch wide by 3 inches tall

Also available in regular milk chocolate and custom requests are welcome. Please specify when
ordering.
May your taste buds know insanity.

Monday, November 22, 2010

The Shadow Over Tintin


Murray Groat did what 80 years of adventures couldn't - make Tintin interesting...and insane.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Monday, February 22, 2010

The Deep Ones Love It


Though one rarely associates Lovecraft with slapstick humor, that's what you'll get in a new horror-comedy about the last living relative of the pulp writer who invented Cthulhu. The Last Lovecraft: Relic of Cthulhu is setting up a limited theatrical run later this year.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Smellcraft, Or The Scent That Should Not Be

Insanity. Horror. Aftershave?

Yes, Cthulhu has a perfume. It it real and can be purchased
here. This is the description of the scent -- caution it may cause utter madness:

"A creeping, wet, slithering scent, dripping with seaweed, oceanic plants and dark, unfathomable waters."

Not impressed (or scared shitless)? How about if I told you they also offer scents for The Deep Ones, Miskatonic University, Nyarlathotep, R'lyeh, Shoggoth, Azathoth, The High Priest Not to Be Described? Still can't get on board with the olfactory lunacy?

What if I said they had a perfume for Herbert West, the goddamn Re-Animator ("embalming fluid and splatterings from a panoply of reanimation reagents")? There are 16 (!) mad scents in all

The 5 milliliter samples are $15, and the 10 ml ones are $25. You can blame Black Phoenix Alchemy Labs for unleashing these odors onto the world. Just think of all the terror you'll cause during the holidays with this as a gift.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Craziness x 3

Regular

Extra

Ultra

Friday, March 6, 2009

Homeroom Of Madness

Arguing that students should return to the fundamentals taught in the Pnakotic Manuscripts and the Necronomicon in order to develop the skills they need to be driven to the very edge of sanity, Arkham, MA school board member Charles West continued to advance his pro-madness agenda at the district's monthly meeting earlier in the week.

"Fools!" said West, his clenched fist striking the lectern before him. "We must prepare today's youth for a world whose terrors are etched upon ancient clay tablets recounting the fever-dreams of the other gods—not fill their heads with such trivia as math and English. Our graduates need to know about those who lie beneath the earth, waiting until the stars align so they can return to their rightful place as our masters and wage war against the Elder Things and the shoggoths!"

The controversial school board member reportedly interrupted a heated discussion about adding fresh fruit to school lunches in order to bring his motion to the table. With the aid of a flip chart, West laid out his six-point plan for increased madness, which included field trips to the medieval metaphysics department at Miskatonic University, instruction in the incantations of Yog-Sothoth, and a walkathon sponsored by local businesses to raise money for the freshman basketball program.

"Our schools are orderly, sanitary places where students dwell in blissful ignorance of the chaos that awaits," West said. "Should our facilities be repaired? No, they must be razed to the ground and rebuilt in the image of the Cyclopean dwellings of the Elder Gods, the very geometry of which will drive them to be possessed by visions of the realms beyond." Is there any just cause for his plan? According to a recent study, Cthulhu, a hideous demon borne of pure malice was identified by fewer than 3% of high school sophomores.

West has served on the school board since 1997, when he defeated 89-year-old incumbent Doris Pesce by promising to enforce dress codes and refer repeat disciplinary cases to the three-lobed burning eye. He has run unopposed ever since. "Charles sure likes to bang on that madness drum," fellow school board member Danielle Kolker said. "I'm not totally sold on his plan to let gibbering, half-formed creatures dripping with ichor feed off the flesh and fear of our students. But he is always on time to help set up for our spaghetti suppers, and his bake sale goods are among the most popular."

"I must admit, he's very convincing," Kolker added.

West's previous failed proposals include requiring the high school band to perform the tuneless flute songs of the blind idiot god Azathoth and offering art students instruction in the carving of morbid and obscene fetishes from otherworldly media. Several parents attending the meeting were not impressed by West's outburst. "Last month, he wanted us to change the high school's motto from 'Many Kinds of Excellence' to 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn,'" PTA member Cathy Perry said. "I asked if it was Latin, and he said that it was the eldritch tongue of Shub- Niggurath, the Black Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young. I don't know from eldritch tongues, but I'm not sure that's such a good idea."

"We already changed the name of the school from Abraham Lincoln High to Nyarlathotep Academy," Perry added. "What more does he want?"

Immediately before the vote on his motion, which was defeated eight to one, West gave his final remarks, arguing that the children are our future and that it's the school board's obligation to make sure they are fully versed in the unspeakable horrors still to come.

"In the information age, it is easier than ever to gather knowledge about things that should not be but nonetheless are, and such wisdom could prepare our students to be better citizens amid the ruins of sunken cities infested with swarms of ravenous, bloated rats," West said. "Also, I believe that birth control should not be distributed by the guidance counselor." All of West's remaining proposals were tabled so the board could debate repairing the hole in the locker-room wall, as five students have disappeared in the adjacent skull-filled catacombs since the opening was discovered last week.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Elder Sign

Want it. Need it. Better have it...

Friday, February 6, 2009

Dead Shoggoths

From the mind and realm of Alex CF:

So, as previously mentioned in another blog post, i have had to revisit certain projects for the upcoming monograph. This was a great opportunity to update those past projects, and also allow customers to buy pieces i had decided not to revisit, unless it was really necessary. This was that time, and i am really happy with how these projects are going.

The first of which is this piece, recovered from the Estate of the late geologist William Dyer, a professor from Miskatonic University, massachusetts. It is a specimen case, containing a large quantity of marine flora, and extra terrestrial fauna.

In late 1930, Dyer, accompanied by a large exploration party began an expedition to Antarctica. During this trip various unique fossil specimens were found and drove the scientists to veer from their planned path. It lead them to a mountain range greater than that of the Himalayas. Beyond this, a cyclopean city of alien magnitude - the many million year old remnants of a race known in the pages of the fabled pnakotic manuscipts as the Elder ones.

Contained within this specimen case is the dissected form of an infant Elder; the preserved plastic form of a cellular abomination and slave race known as the The Shoggoth.

And hidden amongst ancient relics, bizarre star shaped talismans, a plethora of samples - is a page of that hellish book, the skin bound, hateful incarnation of prehistoric lore; the book of dead names - The Necronomicon...

Monday, December 8, 2008

Holiday Creatures

Two interesting treats for the season. For the Jews, a Godzilla menorah, which can be found here. And curently on eBay auction for the gentiles and cultists, a very snappy Elder God with a list of his own.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Flashy

There are over 150 of the top flash games here, selected from the thousands online as researched and tested by Tech Cult. And these are some that I'd played incessantly in the past and agree are a great way to waste a day...it's Friday - go ahead!

Bowmaster

Bowmaster has some strategy and RPG elements, but you will win the game with the accuracy of your aim. All you have is your bow, and you need to defend your castle from a horde of assaulting ogres. Your mouse controls both the direction and the power of the arrows.


Zuma

On Zuma, you have a train of jewels that move along a track, and on the center of the scenario you control a frog that spits jewels of different colors. Your objective is to align three or more jewels of the same color to make them pop, making sure that the train will not reach the end of the track. Cool graphics and sound effects complement the game.


Tennis Game

The classic tennis game (remember the one for NES...pretty much the same thing). Use the arrow keys to move and space to hit the ball. The arrows control the direction of the hit as well. You can play either an exhibition match or the world championship. Simple but addictive.



Boxhead

Massacre all the box-headed zombies. In your arsenal, you’ll find guns, UZIs, shotguns, explosive barrels and even hand grenades! Part of the fun is not having a time limit, so you can construct bottlenecks and destroy massive amounts of constantly replenishing undead!



Bejeweled

This is the same well-known game where you have to swap adjacent gems to align a set of three or more similar gems, and make combos and cascades to score more points. The game has two versions: a normal and a timed one, and is a good substitute for those who don't own a Treo or iPhone already loaded with it.



Deanimator

Based on a "certain horror story", you get to play as "Dr. Herbert West". You start with a revolver, six bullet chambers, and a bunch of zombies to take down. Reload timing is important here. Once you get a shotgun, use the shift key to switch between the two weapons.


I can't believe they left out Parking Zone, which is super fun too.

Friday, September 26, 2008

My Little Awesome

Mari Kasurinen makes My Little Pony cool. From My Little Catwoman to My Little Predator, they're all improvements on the original.







Monday, August 25, 2008

Ground Sounds And Tones Of The Unknown

Noise Addict has some Earth-y tones that anything but obvious in their origin.

The Bloop
At various times during the summer of 1997, an ultra-low frequency sound that rose rapidly in frequency over about one minute was detected at 50 degrees S, 100 degrees W. The sound was detected by the
US National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration with the Equatorial Pacific Ocean autonomous hydrophone array (which was U.S. Navy equipment originally designed to detect Soviet submarines), and was loud enough to be heard on multiple sensors, up to 5000km apart. Scientists dubbed it the "Bloop" (not to be confused with the "Boing".)

Although the sound matches the profile of a living animal, it is much louder than any known creature can produce. Any creature that could produce such a sound would have to be many times larger than the largest whale. You can hear a very short recording of the sound here . The recording is short because it’s been sped up 16x to make it audible to you and I. Some people link the Bloop to Cthulhu , a mythical creature from an H.P. Lovecraft story as the noise originated from an area near the mythical sunken city of R’lyeh from the same story.

The Bloop also makes an appearance in the game promoting the movie Cloverfield, and was also seen in the movie "The Loch", coming from a giant eel. A 2001 album by Dntel ("Life is full of possibilities ") uses the bloop as a repeating sample through the piece. The actual origination of the sound is not known and remains a mystery to this day although it is suspected to be biological in origin.


The Hum
The hum is the name of a phenomenon that is generally given to mysterious low frequency humming or rumbling. It is typically heard by many people at a time (but not others), and can come and go or it can be constant. There are many famous Hums, most notably the Taos Hum and the Bristol Hum.

The Hum is usually difficult to record, and it’s often difficult to localize the source of the hum (perhaps due to the low frequency, as low frequency sounds are harder to localize).
Hums have been detected (or reported) all over the world, but most appear in Europe and South America. The Hum is more often heard indoors, and some people hear it more faintly than others.
Here is a recording of the Auckland Hum.

The Taos Hum has been featured on the X-Files and Unsolved Mysteries. The source of some Hums have been identified - for example, a pair of fans in a cooling tower at a DaimlerChrysler casting plant was emitting a 36 Hz tone that caused a Hum over the entire city of Kokomo, Indiana. Other Hums remain a mystery. Some possible explanations Include geological events, pulsed microwaves and electromagnetic waves from meteors. Tinnitus might explain some cases as well.

A creditable scientific hypothesis from 2005 suggests the Hum is caused by the tensor tympani muscle (a muscle in the inner ear) trembling in the eardrums of individuals. on the eardrums of affected individuals by the tensor tympani muscle trembling. There is a website by the "Interest Group for Research of the Hum Nuisance" (unfortunately in German) describing this theory.

The Hell Hole
More than forty years ago, researchers in the Soviet Union began an ambitious drilling project whose goal was to penetrate the Earth’s upper crust and sample the warm, mysterious area where the crust and mantle intermingle– the Mohorovičić discontinuity, or "Moho." This type of drilling was completely new and the technology didn’t exist to go that deep, and so the Russians had to invent a completely new was of drilling to be able to do it. Unfortunately, the Russians never reached their goal, and many of the Earth’s secrets were left undiscovered, however The Kola Superdeep Borehole is still a scientifically useful site, and research there is ongoing.

When drilling stopped in 1994, the hole was over seven miles deep, making it by far the deepest hole ever drilled by humans. The last of the cores to be plucked from from the borehole were dated to be about 2.7 billion years old. Although the Kona hole was the deepest hole ever drilled (until this one), seven miles was still very short of the 20-80km required to penetrate the earth’s crust.

Like all newfangled science stories, some Genesis freaks have decided that the intent of the project was not real scientific research as they were told - rather this simple experiment was actually an attempt to drill to hell… and that they were successful! The story has (and still does) made its rounds on Christian circles via tracts, preaching and radio broadcasts.

The story varies, but here are the basics:
- After going only a few miles down, the drill began to spin wildly.
- A ‘Doctor Azzakov’ is quoted as stating authoritatively that it has been shown that the earth is hollow.
- Immensely high temperatures were experienced, much higher than expected at that depth. Usually 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit or 1,100 degrees Celsius is quoted.
- Microphones were lowered into the hole (to ‘listen to the earth’s movement’). Human screams were heard—hordes of ‘tortured souls’.
- Many of the scientists have quit the project in fear and/or have become total nervous wrecks.

Of course, these "facts" are not quite true: If the earth was largely hollow, it would clearly be evident from seismic studies, as well as from orbital/gravitational considerations, but this is not the case. Far from being a ‘fiery inferno’, the temperature increased by one degree Celsius every 100 meters to 3,000 meters, then by 2.5 degrees every 100 meters thereafter. At 10,000 meters, it was only 180 degrees.

The story of course is based on a factual borehole, and creation geologists have had a field day with the shaky "facts" - using the story to prove that yes, hell exists and they’ve been right all along. Here’s the "quote" that has been making it’s way through evangelical circles:

"We lowered a microphone, designed to detect the sounds of plate movements down the shaft. But instead of plate movements we heard a human voice screaming in pain! At first we thought the sound was coming from our own equipment. But when we made adjustments our worst suspicions were confirmed. The screams weren’t those of a single human, they were the screams of millions of humans!"

Oh, you wanted to HEAR the screams from hell? But of course! Listen to it here (or here ) .

Mistpouffers
In some places in the world, people have reported long successions of enormously loud booming noises. They are called different things in different areas of the world - “Guns of the Seneca” (near Seneca Lake in New York), “
Barisal guns ” (in Bangladesh), “uminari” (in Japan), “fog guns,” “lake guns,” and many other terms. These terms all describe a sound or sounds that resemble distant cannon fire, and are usually heard near large bodies of water. Often times they are accompanied by a long rumble that is strong enough to shake plates and pictures.

There have been many proposed
theories about where these sounds come from, however most are not very satisfying. Since these sounds have been reported for centuries means that the most obvious explanation, artillery tests , are pretty much ruled out. Earthquakes and volcanoes could produce these sounds and rumbles, however the sounds have not been directly connected to any seismic activity, which is fairly well measured.

Some have speculated that undersea activity (perhaps seismic) creates great bubbles of released gas which floats to the surface and creates huge "ocean farts", however it is a stretch to think that these bubbles could produce a sound strong enough to create the distant-gunfire sound of Mistpouffers. Meteorite impacts have also been bandied about as a possible explanation (see here for actual meteor sounds) as have tidal waves .

It has also been speculated that these noises happen everywhere and that ambient noise from communities simply make them harder to hear. Sound travels farther over water than over land, and so the sounds are more easily heard in remote, quiet areas close to bodies of water.

Of course the latest theory is rather boring - that the sounds are made by thunder or other explosions very far away, and the sounds simply travels a very, very long way because atmospheric and topographic conditions happen to be "just so". This would explain why no storms or other activity are present in the area and yet the sounds are still heard.
Some people still believe that the sounds are made from alien spacecraft, God, or Thor’s hammer banging on nails while trying to fix the roof over the heavens…. however there is another theory: A web page describing the many tourist attractions of the Cayuga Lake area mentions the “Guns of the Seneca.” it also says “At the southern end, you’ll find the booming city of Ithaca…” Well, that it. What people are hearing is obviously the sound of Ithaca booming.


Slow Down
Slow down was recorded in the Pacific Ocean on May 19,1997. It was recorded by the U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration located around 15 degrees S 115, degrees W. It is called the Slow Down because the sound slowly decreases in frequency over the span of about 7 minutes. It was detected using the same hydrophone array as the Bloop, and was loud enough to be detected on multiple sensors 2000km apart.

Here is a recording of the sound, sped up by 16 times. Some people believe that this sound has been made by a giant squid or other large sea creature, however this theory doesn’t stand up to scientific reason, as squids likey with tdo not have the capability of producing their beaks ese sounds. The real source of the Slow Down sound remains completely unknown. This signal and anything like it has not been heard before or since.

The WOW!
No discussion of mysterious sounds would be complete without this one, although it’s not a sound from earth - it’s from space.

On August 15, 1977 a SETI scientist working at the Big Ear radio telescope of the Ohio State University noticed a very strong signal that lasted for 72 seconds. The type of signal resembled signals that are non-terrestrial and non-solar system in origin. Because the signal was so remarkable, The scientists circled the data on the computer printout and wrote the word "WOW!" beside it. Ever since then, it’s been called the "Wow!" signal.
Since the signal was discovered, scientists from all over have tried to locate it again, however it has never been seen since. It has been theorized by some people that the signal may have come from extraterrestrial life, however others remain skeptical. More information on the Wow can be found here by the person who discovered it.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Cthulhu To You Too

The damned thing's called Cthulhu - do you even need to know more? Like when he returns to the quaint little fishing village where he grew up, Russ gets sexed up by old lovers, finds his father is the leader of a doomsday cult, and uncovers a plot to end the world. I told you - CHTULHU!

Friday, June 6, 2008

Ectoplasmosis

For Scartoe and other Lovecraftian affectionados, Ectoplasmosis is a site with a mix of the strange, obscure, and underground - all with the touch of an Ancient One's tentacle. There's Moustache Mondays, Cthuhlu Cthursadays, Saturday morning cartoons, alternative artistry, steampunk gadgets and apparel, music, and just plain ol' weird shit. It's as close to fringe living as you want to get without crossing the threshold.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

The Cake That Should Not Be

All cakes should be this horrifying.

Here is Cthulhu rising from the oceans, using a convenient little island with a tower on it to climb up. The base was cherry-chip cake, the island and tower a mix of cherry chip and yellow cake with chocolate frosting. Also used small chocolate ‘pearls’ as rocks. Cthulhu himself is all fondant, with two chocolate pearls that I seeped in red dye for eyes.

For Cakethulhu and others, go here.