Thursday, March 22, 2012
The Deep Ones From The Great Lakes?
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
The Delicious Ones
May your taste buds know insanity.From the depths of R'lyeh comes an idol of Cthulhu cast in solid green milk chocolate! I am doing a limited production run of these for a short time only. If you would like one (or a few) please follow the paypal link. Each idol is $10. I will combine shipping for multiple orders.
Idol measures 1 inch by 1 inch wide by 3 inches tall
Also available in regular milk chocolate and custom requests are welcome. Please specify when ordering.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Monday, August 2, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
The Deep Ones Love It
Though one rarely associates Lovecraft with slapstick humor, that's what you'll get in a new horror-comedy about the last living relative of the pulp writer who invented Cthulhu. The Last Lovecraft: Relic of Cthulhu is setting up a limited theatrical run later this year.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Smellcraft, Or The Scent That Should Not Be
Insanity. Horror. Aftershave?Yes, Cthulhu has a perfume. It it real and can be purchased here. This is the description of the scent -- caution it may cause utter madness:
"A creeping, wet, slithering scent, dripping with seaweed, oceanic plants and dark, unfathomable waters."
Not impressed (or scared shitless)? How about if I told you they also offer scents for The Deep Ones, Miskatonic University, Nyarlathotep, R'lyeh, Shoggoth, Azathoth, The High Priest Not to Be Described? Still can't get on board with the olfactory lunacy?
The 5 milliliter samples are $15, and the 10 ml ones are $25. You can blame Black Phoenix Alchemy Labs for unleashing these odors onto the world. Just think of all the terror you'll cause during the holidays with this as a gift.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Friday, March 6, 2009
Homeroom Of Madness
Arguing that students should return to the fundamentals taught in the Pnakotic Manuscripts and the Necronomicon in order to develop the skills they need to be driven to the very edge of sanity, Arkham, MA school board member Charles West continued to advance his pro-madness agenda at the district's monthly meeting earlier in the week."Fools!" said West, his clenched fist striking the lectern before him. "We must prepare today's youth for a world whose terrors are etched upon ancient clay tablets recounting the fever-dreams of the other gods—not fill their heads with such trivia as math and English. Our graduates need to know about those who lie beneath the earth, waiting until the stars align so they can return to their rightful place as our masters and wage war against the Elder Things and the shoggoths!"
The controversial school board member reportedly interrupted a heated discussion about adding fresh fruit to school lunches in order to bring his motion to the table. With the aid of a flip chart, West laid out his six-point plan for increased madness, which included field trips to the medieval metaphysics department at Miskatonic University, instruction in the incantations of Yog-Sothoth, and a walkathon sponsored by local businesses to raise money for the freshman basketball program.
"Our schools are orderly, sanitary places where students dwell in blissful ignorance of the chaos that awaits," West said. "Should our facilities be repaired? No, they must be razed to the ground and rebuilt in the image of the Cyclopean dwellings of the Elder Gods, the very geometry of which will drive them to be possessed by visions of the realms beyond." Is there any just cause for his plan? According to a recent study, Cthulhu, a hideous demon borne of pure malice was identified by fewer than 3% of high school sophomores.
West has served on the school board since 1997, when he defeated 89-year-old incumbent Doris Pesce by promising to enforce dress codes and refer repeat disciplinary cases to the three-lobed burning eye. He has run unopposed ever since. "Charles sure likes to bang on that madness drum," fellow school board member Danielle Kolker said. "I'm not totally sold on his plan to let gibbering, half-formed creatures dripping with ichor feed off the flesh and fear of our students. But he is always on time to help set up for our spaghetti suppers, and his bake sale goods are among the most popular."
"I must admit, he's very convincing," Kolker added.
West's previous failed proposals include requiring the high school band to perform the tuneless flute songs of the blind idiot god Azathoth and offering art students instruction in the carving of morbid and obscene fetishes from otherworldly media. Several parents attending the meeting were not impressed by West's outburst. "Last month, he wanted us to change the high school's motto from 'Many Kinds of Excellence' to 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn,'" PTA member Cathy Perry said. "I asked if it was Latin, and he said that it was the eldritch tongue of Shub- Niggurath, the Black Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young. I don't know from eldritch tongues, but I'm not sure that's such a good idea."
"We already changed the name of the school from Abraham Lincoln High to Nyarlathotep Academy," Perry added. "What more does he want?"
Immediately before the vote on his motion, which was defeated eight to one, West gave his final remarks, arguing that the children are our future and that it's the school board's obligation to make sure they are fully versed in the unspeakable horrors still to come.
"In the information age, it is easier than ever to gather knowledge about things that should not be but nonetheless are, and such wisdom could prepare our students to be better citizens amid the ruins of sunken cities infested with swarms of ravenous, bloated rats," West said. "Also, I believe that birth control should not be distributed by the guidance counselor." All of West's remaining proposals were tabled so the board could debate repairing the hole in the locker-room wall, as five students have disappeared in the adjacent skull-filled catacombs since the opening was discovered last week.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
Dead Shoggoths
From the mind and realm of Alex CF:So, as previously mentioned in another blog post, i have had to revisit certain projects for the upcoming monograph. This was a great opportunity to update those past projects, and also allow customers to buy pieces i had decided not to revisit, unless it was really necessary. This was that time, and i am really happy with how these projects are going.
The first of which is this piece, recovered from the Estate of the late geologist William Dyer, a professor from Miskatonic University, massachusetts. It is a specimen case, containing a large quantity of marine flora, and extra terrestrial fauna.
In late 1930, Dyer, accompanied by a large exploration party began an expedition to Antarctica. During this trip various unique fossil specimens were found and drove the scientists to veer from their planned path. It lead them to a mountain range greater than that of the Himalayas. Beyond this, a cyclopean city of alien magnitude - the many million year old remnants of a race known in the pages of the fabled pnakotic manuscipts as the Elder ones.
Contained within this specimen case is the dissected form of an infant Elder; the preserved plastic form of a cellular abomination and slave race known as the The Shoggoth.
And hidden amongst ancient relics, bizarre star shaped talismans, a plethora of samples - is a page of that hellish book, the skin bound, hateful incarnation of prehistoric lore; the book of dead names - The Necronomicon...
Monday, December 8, 2008
Holiday Creatures
Friday, November 14, 2008
Flashy
Bowmaster has some strategy and RPG elements, but you will win the game with the accuracy of your aim. All you have is your bow, and you need to defend your castle from a horde of assaulting ogres. Your mouse controls both the direction and the power of the arrows.
On Zuma, you have a train of jewels that move along a track, and on the center of the scenario you control a frog that spits jewels of different colors. Your objective is to align three or more jewels of the same color to make them pop, making sure that the train will not reach the end of the track. Cool graphics and sound effects complement the game.
Friday, September 26, 2008
My Little Awesome
Mari Kasurinen makes My Little Pony cool. From My Little Catwoman to My Little Predator, they're all improvements on the original. Monday, August 25, 2008
Ground Sounds And Tones Of The Unknown
At various times during the summer of 1997, an ultra-low frequency sound that rose rapidly in frequency over about one minute was detected at 50 degrees S, 100 degrees W. The sound was detected by the US National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration with the Equatorial Pacific Ocean autonomous hydrophone array (which was U.S. Navy equipment originally designed to detect Soviet submarines), and was
loud enough to be heard on multiple sensors, up to 5000km apart. Scientists dubbed it the "Bloop" (not to be confused with the "Boing".)The Bloop also makes an appearance in the game promoting the movie Cloverfield, and was also seen in the movie "The Loch", coming from a giant eel. A 2001 album by Dntel ("Life is full of possibilities ") uses the bloop as a repeating sample through the piece. The actual origination of the sound is not known and remains a mystery to this day although it is suspected to be biological in origin.
The Hum
The hum is the name of a phenomenon that is generally given to mysterious low frequency humming or rumbling. It is typically heard by many people at a time (but not others), and can come and go or it can be constant. There are many famous Hums, most notably the Taos Hum and the Bristol Hum.
The Hum is usually difficult to record, and it’s often difficult to localize the source of the hum (perhaps due to the low frequency, as low frequency sounds are harder to localize).
Hums have been detected (or reported) all over the world, but most appear in Europe and South America. The Hum is more often heard indoors, and some people hear it more faintly than others. Here is a recording of the Auckland Hum.
The Taos Hum has been featured on the X-Files and Unsolved Mysteries. The source of some Hums have been identified - for example, a pair of fans in a cooling tower at a DaimlerChrysler casting plant was emitting a 36 Hz tone that caused a Hum over the entire city of Kokomo, Indiana. Other Hums remain a mystery. Some possible explanations Include geological events, pulsed microwaves and electromagnetic waves from meteors. Tinnitus might explain some cases as well.
A creditable scientific hypothesis from 2005 suggests the Hum is caused by the tensor tympani muscle (a muscle in the inner ear) trembling in the eardrums of individuals. on the eardrums of affected individuals by the tensor tympani muscle trembling. There is a website by the "Interest Group for Research of the Hum Nuisance" (unfortunately in German) describing this theory.
More than forty years ago, researchers in the Soviet Union began an ambitious drilling project whose goal was to penetrate the Earth’s upper crust and sample the warm, mysterious area where the crust and mantle intermingle– the Mohorovičić discontinuity, or "Moho." This type of drilling was completely new and the technology didn’t exist to go that deep, and so the Russians had to invent a completely new was of drilling to be able to do it. Unfortunately, the Russians never reached their goal, and many of the Earth’s secrets were left undiscovered, however The Kola Superdeep Borehole is still a scientifically useful site, and research there is ongoing.
When drilling stopped in 1994, the hole was over seven miles deep, making it by
far the deepest hole ever drilled by humans. The last of the cores to be plucked from from the borehole were dated to be about 2.7 billion years old. Although the Kona hole was the deepest hole ever drilled (until this one), seven miles was still very short of the 20-80km required to penetrate the earth’s crust. Like all newfangled science stories, some Genesis freaks have decided that the intent of the project was not real scientific research as they were told - rather this simple experiment was actually an attempt to drill to hell… and that they were successful! The story has (and still does) made its rounds on Christian circles via tracts, preaching and radio broadcasts.
The story varies, but here are the basics:
Of course, these "facts" are not quite true: If the earth was largely hollow, it would clearly be evident from seismic studies, as well as from orbital/gravitational considerations, but this is not the case. Far from being a ‘fiery inferno’, the temperature increased by one degree Celsius every 100 meters to 3,000 meters, then by 2.5 degrees every 100 meters thereafter. At 10,000 meters, it was only 180 degrees.
The story of course is based on a factual borehole, and creation geologists have had a field day with the shaky "facts" - using the story to prove that yes, hell exists and they’ve been right all along. Here’s the "quote" that has been making it’s way through evangelical circles:
"We lowered a microphone, designed to detect the sounds of plate movements down the shaft. But instead of plate movements we heard a human voice screaming in pain! At first we thought the sound was coming from our own equipment. But when we made adjustments our worst suspicions were confirmed. The screams weren’t those of a single human, they were the screams of millions of humans!"
In some places in the world, people have reported long successions of enormously loud booming noises. They are called different things in different areas of the world - “Guns of the Seneca” (near Seneca Lake in New York), “Barisal guns ” (in Bangladesh), “uminari” (in Japan), “fog guns,” “lake guns,” and many other terms. These terms all describe a sound or sounds that resemble distant cannon fire, and are usually heard near large bodies of water. Often times they are accompanied by a long rumble that is strong enough to shake plates and pictures.
There have been many proposed theories about where these sounds come from, however most are not very satisfying. Since these sounds have been reported for centuries means that the most obvious explanation, artillery tests , are pretty much ruled out. Earthquakes and volcanoes could produce these sounds and rumbles, however the sounds have not been directly connected to any seismic activity, which is fairly well measured.
Some have speculated that undersea activity (perhaps seismic) creates great bubbles of released gas which floats to the surface and creates huge "ocean farts", however it is a stretch to think that these bubbles could produce a sound strong enough to create the distant-gunfire sound of Mistpouffers. Meteorite impacts have also been bandied about as a possible explanation (see here for actual meteor sounds) as have tidal waves .
It has also been speculated that these noises happen everywhere and that ambient noise from communities simply make them harder to hear. Sound travels farther over water than over land, and so the sounds are more easily heard in remote, quiet areas close to bodies of water. Of course the latest theory is rather boring - that the sounds are made by thunder or other explosions very far away, and the sounds simply travels a very, very long way because atmospheric and topographic conditions happen to be "just so". This would explain why no storms or other activity are present in the area and yet the sounds are still heard.
Some people still believe that the sounds are made from alien spacecraft, God, or Thor’s hammer banging on nails while trying to fix the roof over the heavens…. however there is another theory: A web page describing the many tourist attractions of the Cayuga Lake area mentions the “Guns of the Seneca.” it also says “At the southern end, you’ll find the booming city of Ithaca…” Well, that it. What people are hearing is obviously the sound of Ithaca booming.
Slow down was recorded in the Pacific Ocean on May 19,1997. It was
recorded by the U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration located around 15 degrees S 115, degrees W. It is called the Slow Down because the sound slowly decreases in frequency over the span of about 7 minutes. It was detected using the same hydrophone array as the Bloop, and was loud enough to be detected on multiple sensors 2000km apart. Here is a recording of the sound, sped up by 16 times. Some people believe that this sound has been made by a giant squid or other large sea creature, however this theory doesn’t stand up to scientific reason, as squids likey with tdo not have the capability of producing their beaks ese sounds. The real source of the Slow Down sound remains completely unknown. This signal and anything like it has not been heard before or since.
No discussion of mysterious sounds would be complete without this one, although it’s not a sound from earth - it’s
from space.On August 15, 1977 a SETI scientist working at the Big Ear radio telescope of the Ohio State University noticed a very strong signal that lasted for 72 seconds. The type of signal resembled signals that are non-terrestrial and non-solar system in origin. Because the signal was so remarkable, The scientists circled the data on the computer printout and wrote the word "WOW!" beside it. Ever since then, it’s been called the "Wow!" signal.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Cthulhu To You Too
The damned thing's called Cthulhu - do you even need to know more? Like when he returns to the quaint little fishing village where he grew up, Russ gets sexed up by old lovers, finds his father is the leader of a doomsday cult, and uncovers a plot to end the world. I told you - CHTULHU!
Friday, June 6, 2008
Ectoplasmosis
For Scartoe and other Lovecraftian affectionados, Ectoplasmosis is a site with a mix of the strange, obscure, and underground - all with the touch of an Ancient One's tentacle. There's Moustache Mondays, Cthuhlu Cthursadays, Saturday morning cartoons, alternative artistry, steampunk gadgets and apparel, music, and just plain ol' weird shit. It's as close to fringe living as you want to get without crossing the threshold.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
The Cake That Should Not Be
All cakes should be this horrifying.Here is Cthulhu rising from the oceans, using a convenient little island with a tower on it to climb up. The base was cherry-chip cake, the island and tower a mix of cherry chip and yellow cake with chocolate frosting. Also used small chocolate ‘pearls’ as rocks. Cthulhu himself is all fondant, with two chocolate pearls that I seeped in red dye for eyes.






















