Crap Farm

Glee may be rekindling the public's love affair with the cheesy "let me tell ya about it...in a song!" side of entertainment, but some ideas should just not ever leave the discussion stage. Can there be any possible good reason to mix Orwellian dystopia and showtunes?

Elton John and Lee Hall (who wrote the screenplay for Billy Elliot)are working on adapting Animal Farm into a stage musical. Hall said it took about two years to secure the rights for the project, and that he is now “deep into it, writing songs for pigs and other four-legged friends.” Look, it's great that Elton John's songs in The Lion King pushed the cartoon towards an easier Broadway transition, but sixty year old political allegory about communism and Russia? Who is the idiot who thought more people dressed in animal costumes doing soft shoe was necessary?

“Elton likes to have the lyrics done and have them in front of him so I’ll work on a batch before I give him anything to look at,” added Hall on the current status. Elton John also used to like naked men and drugs done in batches before him too. I don't think catering to his whimsy is worth indulging.

It would probably take another two years before the musical is finished, and now I'm actually hoping the Mayans were right. No producers or theatrical companies are officially attached yet, and no actors have been cast, so there is a chance that it dies like so many other awful musical theater projects. I will never stop loving the best sentence in the story (and perhaps modern literature), "All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others", but goddamn it if they're not trying with this retarded project.