Newtered

Republican presidential candidate and all-around sack of shit Newt Gingrich signed a pledge to uphold conservative values of the Iowa-based conservative Christian group The Family Leader in order to pander for votes and money for his campaign.  Yeah, like a pledge every kept a politician from thinking with his dick.

While the document is really just a checklist of right-wing beliefs - including states rights, preventing gay marriage, and promoting an anti-abortion agenda, his credibility can't support a simple like statement like "I also pledge to uphold the institution of marriage through personal fidelity to my spouse and respect for the marital bonds of others." If that sounds familiar coming out of one side of his fat mouth, it's because you've heard it a few times before, whole the other side of his mouth was sweet-talking his mistresses.

You see, he made a no-adultery pledge back in 2000 to current wife Callista, which should have made her feel comforted, since she was his plaything while he was married to Marianne Ginther.  And it did not serve as warning to Marianne back in 1981, when she received a no-adultery pledge after being the other woman to then-wife Jackie Battley.  And as you could have predicted, Battley got that same worthless no-adultery pledge when she and Gingrich married in 1962.

Of course, since Newty has gone on television and admitted his wrongdoing, all is forgiven, right? "In my case, I said up front openly, I've made mistakes at times...I've had to go to God for forgiveness. I've had to seek reconciliation." Well, if God - I mean , Newt Gingrich's God, has forgiven him, then surely there's plenty of red state voters who can too.  But at that level, he's already got the vote of those who are just looking at his pro-life, pro-state, and pro-family jawing and none of the actual actions of the person presenting them.

Gingrich has long been a typical scumbag politician of the highest degree, and once again he's jumping through the same hoops for show - and we shouldn't expect anything less from his kind.  But giving lip service to counter the mouth service he's done in the past isn't enough to make me think he's in going to stay in check - an more importantly, true to his words.