Whatever Happened To Those Kids From The Never Ending Story?

Everybody remembers that movie, right? And nobody could understand when Atreyu was yelling name of the princess, right? You recall cute, innocent Bastian? He was the loser tool of the film, reading the book while Atreyu was doing all the work. In other words, a huge vagina. So whatever happened to that little dude?

Barret Oliver starred in tons of movies in the 80’s. He was in D.A.R.Y.L where he played a creepy cyborg kid who hit lots of home runs. He was the grandson David in Cocoon. Where did he go? I think Cocoon 2: The Return is where this kid must have fallen off the deep end.

That cute little David wasn’t so cute anymore. In the sequel he played a dorky, loser teen who couldn’t hit a baseball for the life of him. The movie focused on his inner struggles of becoming a man and trying to fit in. So instead of doing normal things like smoking pot or getting drunk with the boys, David decided to hang out with his grandfather Wilford Brimley about 17 times a day. Even his Brims was like “dude, what the hell are you hanging around me for? Go get a chick and leave me alone you douche.”

Anyway, he looked very gawky in that movie and still does today. The last time anyone saw this guy was in 1989. Word is, he’s now teaching photography in Los Angeles. Is that not the most shitty ending you could possibly imagine to this story? Don't you wish he were a drug addict or on a reality show. Can we make a reality show with Barret Oliver? “Balls Out With Bastian.” Kind of like “Flavor of Love”, bit with no viking helmets.

Noah Hathaway may have fared better. Noah played Atreyu, and could quite possibly be one of the most badass movie heroes in history. Think about it...the kid barely registered in his teens! He was killing buffalo and fighting giant wolves before he even got pubes.

Perhaps a role like that ruins a man. Never able to recover, he was last sighted in 2003 at some nerd convention, covered in tattoos, married and getting ready to open up a chopper shop. As much as I can make fun of him I wouldn’t mess with the guy. He holds black belts in Tang Soo Do and Shotokan, and is currently learning American Kenpo. Here’s some more on him. Tell Artex we say hi.