Silver Touch

One interesting detail lost in the election coverage yesterday (outside the fantastic tales of voter resurrection and mid-labor ballot casting), is how analyst Nate Silver went 50 for 50 on calling all the state projections.  Data, kids, data...

The Fivethirtyeight.com (by-way-of-NYT) blogger and his political calculus had been targeted by pundits leading up to the election, but his relentless crunching of voter and polling data gave him a 100% success rate.  Rather than "going with his gut" as most talking heads have done, Silver and his algorithms spewed out the results, cold and unbiased.  Back in 2008, his model correctly called 49 out of 50 states - his only misstep was on Indiana, which went to Obama by 0.1%.  Best of all, Silver's mathmagical prowess have earned him many followers who extol his virtue on par with other living legends as Chuck Norris and Mr. T.  Here are just some of his amazing abilities:

• When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Nate Silver.

• Nate Silver threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.

• Nate Silver can delete the Recycling Bin.

• Nate Silver once got bit by a rattle snake. After three days of pain and agony... the rattle snake died.

• Nate Silver doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says, "Now."

• Nate Silver can suffocate a pillow with a man.

• Nate Silver once had a heart attack; his heart lost.

• Nate Silver doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

• Nate Silver can speak French... In Russian.

• When a zombie apocalypses starts, Nate Silver doesn't try to survive. The zombies do. 

• Ghosts sit around campfires and tell Nate Silver stories.

• Nate Silver lost his virginity before his dad did.

• Nate Silver can unscramble an egg.

• Some magicians can walk on water, Nate Silver can swim through land.

• Nate Silver can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

•  There used to be a street named after Nate Silver, but it was changed because nobody crosses Nate Silver and lives.

•  Fear of spiders is arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, fear of Nate Silver is called Logic

•  Nate Silver's computer has no "backspace" button; Nate silver doesn't make mistakes.

• Nate Silver can build a snowman out of rain.

• Nate Silver has already been to Mars; that's why there's no life there anymore.

• Nate Silver can hear sign language.

• Nate Silver can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.

• Nate Silver can slam a revolving door.